Facing Reality

I'm rather wishy-washy when it comes to a lot of things. I like extreme sports, or rather, watching them. Sometimes I'd think that I'd like to participate in one some day, and for the thrill of it, have the opportunity to do it again.

I almost went skydiving once because of the mere thought of it.

I had a dream last night that I was fighting over in the war of arabic countries. That war-themed dream was probably derived from me playing too much Call of Duty 4. We were in a plane and we had to parachute down into the war zone. Somehow, Eugene was my commanding officer and was telling me to jump, but I was too afraid to jump. I actually had butterflies in my stomach during the dream. He then called me a 'fucking pussy' and grabbed me by my backpack and threw me out. The rush was quite surreal, and I swear if in the air I lost control of my bladder system, my bed would've been wet. Good thing I didn't have to go. I landed in a friendly zone and I cowered in the corner, peaking out every now and then to try to pick off some unaware enemy soldier. I remember the aim on my gun really sucked. Then before I knew it, the war was over and the scoreboard appeared in front of me, with my name on the very bottom with no kills.

I woke up and couldn't stop thinking of the fact that I was too pussy even in a dream to jump out of a plane into a warzone. Well, that does take guts to do.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

This morning (or actually, noontime..) I woke up and saw white. My blinds were open from the night before and the bright daylight with the reflections of snow shone inside. The snow was thick. I've never seen this kind of snow, at least not at the beginning of December anyways. I think we've gone without a white Christmas for three years now.

I left my house for work, attempting to drive through the heavy layer of snow on our streets. I saw a man walking his dog. That dog was one of those small dogs. It was walking on top of the snow. I was surprised it didn't sink down beneath, but it was trying pretty hard not to step wrong. I looked at astonishment at this dog's persistence, and the owner caught me, and smiled with me with a grin and greeted me. I waved back to him and continued on.

Down the street I saw two little kids finishing up a snowman, and their parents shoveling the snow while looking on with a smile. I caught their eye and I waved to them. They waved back.

This is what life is supposed to be like.

...GG continues

Two more hours later, and the tow guy finally comes.

What's funny is, the other tow company we called five hours ago has not even dispatched anyone yet.

GG for them.

But it did take our tow guy an hour to get from the offramp of QEW at Mississauga Road to my house... which is two minutes away in normal weather. What???

One of the biggest GGs so far.

Trevor locked his keys in his car. They're still in the ignition. The engine's still idling. The headlights are on.

It's been almost three hours and I suppose the tow guy's almost here.

Pride +1

My drum instructor called me today.

It was nearing the end of the term and that meant inputting our grades.

He told me that what happens is that he gets his students to do a self evaluation rather than having him give us a grade, so he asked me what I thought I deserved.

I really didn't know what I deserved. I was diligent in my practices and tried to improve. Being a drummer of four years, jazz percussion was something that came entirely new to me, but with my experience I still had that sort of head start. I didn't think that I was able to do as well as I hoped to.

Jazz drumming is just so dang hard.

Of course, I didn't want to end up with a very low grade, but I myself am too much of a humble person to say I deserved something high. *gloats in humility*

So I told Dave my explanations of everything, and I asked him, "is it possible for someone like me, with four years of experience under my belt, to quickly be really good at jazz drumming?"

"No, of course not. Definately no."

With that, I gave myself a B..... plus.

"Really?" He said with shock.

I confirmed my B+.

He explained, "Every week you come to class.. I don't think you've even missed one of my classes. And you also come prepared and you do everything I ask you to do. I think you deserve an A+."

"Oh!" I said with shock. "Well.. I was being humble.. heh heh.."

"Yeah, well you said B+ and I said A+, so how about we meet in the middle somewhere at A?"

"Sure," I said. But of course I wanted that A+. But really it was more than enough that I've seemingly gained his approval and his respect enough to get an A+ in a university level jazz percussion course.... of course however much that counts for, I don't know. But this made my day.

The Subconscious

I had a dream last night.

It involved a girl I liked, but I haven't seen her in the longest time. Nothing really reminded me of her as of late, except maybe scrolling through her and catching a glance of her name here and there on the news feed of good ol' facebook. Otherwise, there wasn't any reason for her to pop up in my dreams.

It was nice though.

Job Interview at Merriam's

I had my first ever job interview today. I was ill prepared, considering the fact that my "career" has been a cruise and I treated it as such. Also the lack of experience added to what I thought was a horrible interview was the fact my last two great jobs ("great" = high paying) were obtained via a simple phone interview. I wouldn't have hired me. Well actually, on second thought, I would have hired me because that would've been quite a breeze on everybody!

A week ago I got an email from Merriam's School of Music saying that they want me for a job interview. It seems that spamming my resume all over the place pays off after all! Ever since mindlessly putting myself everywhere, I've been getting offers here and there. Granted, I applied to most jobs that were high-paying general labour and high-paying jobs that nobody really wants, but it feels good to feel wanted.

I went into my interviewer's office, and the first flop up I did was on the most important thing in the whole interview.

The handshake.

I heard about how the handshake tells everything about your character and whatnot. A mere grasp of someone's hand should not be an indicator of someone's personality, but the world thinks otherwise, so I was going crazy over this, especially since I've never shaken the hand of an employer in the context of a job interview.

My fingers were scattered all over the place as I shook her hand. My middle finger extended beyond her wrists and touched her gold bracelet. I thought, "oh no, she must think I'm some pickpocket." The crappy first impression bugged me for the rest of the interview, as I stumbled over my words and stuttered my expertise of music as I bragged how great I was.

Merriam's also told me to prepare two piano pieces of contrasting styles.

Crap.

I haven't touched the piano in a serious manner in such a long time. The night before I was scrambling, going through my books, seeing what pieces I could play. I was going crazy because I couldn't memorize my chosen songs for the life of me. I decided to do it with a book in front of me. Unprofessional, perhaps, but they'd understand that it's been seven years.

After the brutalizing my pieces, I had to do a mock teaching session where the head of the piano department played an 8-year old A.D.D. kid and I had to go through a ten minute mock lesson. I know that these are extreme cases of students so I didn't fear that much about dealing with difficult students. But still, it instilled in me a little bit of fear.

Well, here's where I learn!

Work Rant #?

I officially hate the Lakeshore/Clarkson region.

Today was the worst shift I ever had.

I thought the Dominions at Yonge and Finch was bad, but here, the people were downright rude, arrogant, and full of themselves. Throughout the past year I've developed compassion and a sense of love for my neighbour, but there seems to be an exception that brewed today.

I've never had someone look me in the eye before and tell me to "Fuck off and die now."

Or how about the common resident there that doesn't even bother to give me a simple "hi" when I greet them, or a "good" when I asked how they were. I know that whole thing is very very scripted nowadays, but it's still a better courtesy than the evil glare that I got from almost every jerk that walked past me.

Come on now, it's not like everyone can have a bad day all at once now. There wasn't a national tragedy today as far as I know.

The Great Thomas Lang

I have now met two of my three idols within a year. This year could not get any sweeter.

I attended the Thomas Lang drum clinic at Just Drums today. This man is nothing short of amazing. That's all I can say. Words seriously can't do justice.

Roland hosted this event, so obviously Lang used the flagship TD-20 unit. Because of all the pieces he used, he needed two brains to power that thing. The set is a beast. One day...

At the end there were door prizes. Unfortunately no TD-20, although I'd be filled to the brim with envy if someone other than me won that thing so for the sake of my health and sanity, there was none.

However, something was in the air. I sensed something. Their first prize was the Handsonic 10, and as they reached into their little hat for names, I for some reason had a premonitory moment and heard my name be called. That or I was just daydreaming. Nonetheless, they reached in, pulled out a name, and said, "Jeff....... Park? Is it Park?"

I jumped up and said "that's me!" I didn't care to correct them on my last name, there couldn't have been a Jeff Park there in the audience, and since I've been mispronounced Park on many occasions, this was no exception. I was the winner!!

I had Lang sign it, even though he doesn't play on one, but still.

This year could not get any sweeter.